Around 20,000 people have called a confidential helpline for families with multiple birth children since it was launched in 1991. I'm one of them. In the early days, when Neil was working late, I turned to Twinline for support when getting two babies off to sleep proved a bit much after such a demanding day. Unfortunately I also used to raid the biscuit barrel, but that's another story altogether. Twinline is a national support, listening and information service for parents and professionals caring for twins or more. It's available from 10am to 1pm and from 7pm to 10pm, every day, all year round.
Read on for a volunteer's account of a typical even manning the phoneline. It's humbling stuff.
Twinline is staffed by trained volunteers who are parents of multiples and can answer questions on among other topics, sleep problems, feeding, crying, bad behaviour, discipline or special needs.
Often all the caller needs is five minutes breathing space, a chat or a listening ear from someone who can identify with their situation.
Here, Jo Brown, herself a Twinline listener for five years describes a typical evening in the life of a volunteer.
"The children are chasing each other around the bedroom as I try to get them ready for bed in good time for the start of my evening duty as a Twinline listener. At 7pm, everyone is settled down and has been kissed goodnight. I transfer the Twinline telephone number to my home telephone and make sure my files are ready. It’s not long before the phone rings. It is my back up checking to make sure the connection is okay and to offer her support for the evening. With Twinline, although there is only one listener on duty each evening, there is another listener standing by to talk things through with or to take over if necessary.
Soon after the phone rings again. It is a lady who had just found out she is expecting triplets and doesn't know where to turn. We talk things through and let her know she is not alone. I give her a contact for her local twins club so she can get in touch with other mums in her area. Once we have finished talking, I fill in my confidential record sheet with details of the call.
Time for a cup of tea and some ironing before the phone rings again later on in the evening. This time the caller is a mum of four-year-old twins, just about to start school. The mum is unsure whether they should be separated at school or whether it would be all right for them to go into the same class. After a chat, I suggest she might like to speak to one of Tamba's Honorary Consultants. She agrees and gives me details of when the consultant can contact her. I must pass this information on to my co-ordinator tomorrow. The next caller is wanting some information about where to obtain a triple pushchair and there is a call from someone after some ideas on how to get her twins to sleep through the night.
At 10.30 the phone rings again. The caller is very quiet, but bravely tells me how one of her twins was stillborn. We chat about her experience and she sheds a few tears during the call. Much as she is very happy to have the surviving twin, she feels very guilty being happy when she has lost a baby. I am able to put her in touch with another mum who has had a similar experience. This type of call is quite hard to deal with, but knowing that talking things through with someone has helped the caller makes it all worthwhile.
After this call, everything is very quiet and I have time to put all my record sheets together for posting to the Twinline office. In the morning, I will phone my co-ordinator and give her some brief details of all the calls along with the details of the mum who wanted a referral to Tamba's education consultant. At 11pm my shift ends and I turn the line back before heading off to bed.
Some evenings on duty with Twinline are busier than others, but there are usually around four or five calls. The weekends can be busier, but the days are divided into three shifts so that the load is spread. Some listeners find it easier to do a daytime duty at the weekend. All the listeners do two shifts in a month, one in the week and one at a weekend and there are
occasionally other shifts to cover for other volunteers.
Being a Twinline listener is very rewarding. In our training, we learn how to help callers think through different approaches to their situation and how to assess whether some information would help them. We are also happy just to be a listening ear. All listeners are given a resource file which has a wide range of information. Although being a listener requires some organisation at home, I have the support of my partner who helps out with
the children if I am taking a call or attending a training meeting. For me, I have boosted my self-confidence, learned new skills and made new friends.
Telephone: 0800 138 0509
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