In praise of twins clubs

WHEN you have twins, it can be like living in a goldfish bowl. There’s no doubt you feel special but wherever you go, somebody is watching you.

At the baby clinic, the other mums look concerned and ask: “How on earth do you manage?" In shops, customers eye you up and down as you struggle with the double buggy and on afternoon walks, well-wishers stop to chat.

Of course this all adds to the general delight of having twins but you still long to feel normal, to take part in something without being the centre of attention.

That’s what’s so great about attending a twins club – and why I helped set one up close to home when my daughters were tiny.

Don’t be fooled by the “twins” bit – triplets and more are also very welcome at the thriving clubs all over the country.

There are plenty of volunteers around to make sure the children are safe, they’ll be in a lovely big room with loads of toys to grab little ones’ attention and you are surrounded by people with a common experience.

Within minutes of meeting other mums you feel at home, there’s no stress and no pressure and you don’t feel as if all eyes are on you the minute you enter the room.

For once you can relax and chat.

Usually, babies are welcome from any age. Expectant mums can also drop by for friendly advice and tips on how to survive the first months after their instant family arrives.

I first visited such a group when my daughters, Emily and Melissa were just under a year old. I have to admit that even if I had known about such a group, I’d probably not have found the energy to attend.

But it really is well worth the effort.

It was hard to believe how laid back it was and how quickly the time passed.

More used to trying to keep an eye on two inquisitive babies as everyone around me coped with one, I was impressed by the patience and affection of the volunteers.

And I was delighted by the ease of the mums’ conversation. Within 20 minutes of arriving, I had swapped horror stories about teething, picked up tips on taking a family holiday abroad and discussed the pros and cons of staying at home with the kids versus returning to work.

Groups also have practical information about any help or initiatives available to families of twins, triplets or more.

Personally, I can’t recommend them enough. I also fondly remember visiting the Birmingham twins club Christmas party, and getting some lovely presents from Santa. I’m delighted to see it’s still going strong. You can see what they are up to here.

Blogging about twins or more? Now there’s a good idea!

Details of twins clubs can be found at Twinsonline, Twinsclub, or through Tamba.

Comments

[Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah]

I really feel like the TBaMoms (Tampa Bay Mothers of Multiples) club saved my sanity.

I met two of my best friends there, and I got some of the best advice.

[Linda]

Hi Sarah, yeah it's good to meet people who understand and you feel at ease with. I'll never forget a woman who told me she was so glad she had come along to our twins club as her boys had "never met any other children before" because she found it so hard to get out and about with them as they were so lively.

[Nigel]

We love our twins club, Mid Cheshire, I have been to singleton play groups, but find it hard to fit in as I'm always running after one of ours!at a twins club there is an understanding and I know we are all looking out for each baby. As a sahd dad I also have a bit more to talk about at a twin club, at a play group I would have less in common.