Advice for mum whose twins have tantrums when people peer into pushchair (as featured on Parentdish)

WHAT would you tell a mum upset that her 22-month old boys were having a "tantrum" when passers-by stopped to have a good look at them in their pushchair?

This was the dilemma Parentdish agony aunt Joanne Mallon tackled today - and she asked my opinion too.

Here's what I said:  

It's such a shame that you are letting other people's curiosity put you off getting out and about, your boys obviously don't like being the centre of attention, and who can blame them?

(Photo by sdemory on flickr)

Don't feel bad. Attention can be hard enough to deal with when you are 42 let alone 22 months. Please do not think you are alone in having to deal with these comments and stares and please get it out of your head that people are inevitably thinking you can't cope.

Having two babies to look after means twice the stress and if people can't take this on board, that's their look out. I'd like to see a world where instead of staring, pointing or making ridiculous (however well meant) comments, onlookers could offer to help someone with twins as they struggle to negotiate their pushchairs in shops/narrow pavements or brave public transport.

You are achieving a hell of a lot by getting out and about and looking after your boys, congratulate yourself on this and be kinder to yourself. Perhaps if people look like they are heading your way to make comments about your sons, just tell them politely and firmly you are in a rush and don't have time to chat. You can see some favourite things said to twin parents here.

I do hope it gets easier for you. As a mum of older twins, I can tell you it will. Hang on in there and care less about what other people think – I wish I had learned this earlier. Good luck

You can read the rest of Joanne's advice and article here. 

Lots more twin stuff.

Comments

[Liz (LivingwithKids)]

Brilliant advice - it is hard enough when you have one screaming toddler, I can't imagine what it must be like with two.

I do think the head of this post sounds a bit like a Booker prize winning novel.

x

[Rachel (Strange & Beautiful)]

Goodness, this brings back the bad old days. I do remember my twins going through a phase of this at about this age, especially in supermarkets. Nothing seemed to make them stop and It'd take me twice as long as I was trying to block out thier screaming.

Luckily, it was just a phase and they grew out of it as your boys will.

It's hard to avoid attention if you're the mum of twins and it can be quite negative when they're going through the terrible twos, but don't give up, you'll come out of this stronger!!!

R x

[jinedin]

Just a general comment on how helpful and informative a blog you run. To that end have passed on a tag/award from http://www.ehmummy.wordpress.com and want to say thanks.

[Snow white]

As an identical twin who had to put up with lots of silly comments and now a mum to twins - I too hurry along and not stop to 'chit chat' - some people just don't think before they speak!

[Linda]

Hi - thank you everyone for commenting, there is a comment on the original piece saying you can also position/buy your pushchair to help cut down on this sort of thing too, sounds good to me!
Jinedin - thanks a million! Will be with you in a minute!