'You've got your hands full'

Why twins' parties needn't be double the trouble

FOR as long as my daughters have been school-age, I've considered it inevitable they'd be invited to different parties, one without the other.

 

This meant that when they were younger, we tended to try and make the time special for our other daughter in some way while their sister was out celebrating.

 

These days we basically just tell them ‘that’s life.’ They both have their own mates after all and we wouldn’t expect other mums to automatically invite their sister.

Breaking the silence carnival of blog posts about mental illness

WHY a carnival about mental health?

I feel very strongly about mental health issues. I have suffered from what everyone always just called "black moods" now and again all my adult life. I didn't know what this meant and would just go to bed to let these fleeting feelings pass. But you can't do that when you are a mum or well, busy at work can you?

And then I got worse. I contemplated throwing myself out of the window, of deliberately crashing my car, telling myself I wasn't worthy of my family's love and that they would be better off without me. I was terrified of how my children would be affected by my mental illness.

My upbringing was to ignore, shun, dismiss or ridicule people who are mentally ill. I was told by family, friends and the media through news reporting and entertainment that those who "succumbed" to a mental illness were either weak, dangerous or just a bit odd. These people either deserved our pity or we should be scared of them. They didn't amount to much and if they were people in positions of trust, authority or power, then well they couldn't have been very good in their job, if they ended up cracking up.

BBC Coventry and Warwickshire radio interview about twins

A FEW weeks back I was interviewed by Mark Powlett on BBC Coventry and Warwickshire about twins.

Our chat touched on the following among other things and I hope you enjoy it:

• A unique bond between twins
• Sibling rivalry
• Do you dress twins the same?
• Should they be in the same class at school?
• How does a twin pregnancy compare to a singleton one?
• My crap maths

I know I sound a bit "eccentric" which is of course a polite way of saying well, a bit strange, but then I always do on the radio. I don't care as I've got used to it!

Press on the button below to hear the interview.

Massive thanks to producer Kate for sending me the MP3.

Twins and secondary school

IN a few weeks' time, my daughters will start secondary school.

They are definitely in different classes and there's a chance they won't be in the same groups for subjects where pupils are streamed.

I like it that way.

At the introductory parents' evening, my girls' new teachers made encouraging noises about recognising that every child is an individual.

Did you know that according to experts, twins -- and triplets, quads and any "higher multiples" you care to mention for that matter -- are deserving of special consideration in the classroom?

Everyday Stranger on the "fragility and darkness" of postnatal depression

SHANNON's blog Everyday Stranger, is a new find for me. It's filled with beautiful writing and photos and  captivating thoughts.

She's also shortlisted for a Best Writer award in The MADs, where her blog is described as a "glorious patchwork of stories."

Here, she shares with us her experience of depression and what I'd call a cautious optimism about life on the other side.

Thank you Shannon for sharing your story, which I'm also including at Breaking the Silence.

She writes:

MY twins are two years old now, hurtling towards three.

This morning our son decided to "caterpillar" across the floor with his Thomas the Tank Engine trains, and our daughter politely asked “Can I have a turn too please?” after her brother had a spin from his half-sister.

They sing, they hold my hands, the kiss me, they fill my days with light.

It hasn’t always been this way.

Multiple mayhem -- a carnival of posts about twins and more

PHEW. Thank you so much for all your support of this special week on You've Got Your Hands Full which has reminded me why I set this blog up in the first place and put me in touch with some fabulous blogs, some already familiar, others new to me.

If you can say one thing that unites all parents of multiples, well it's that they're busy.

Forgive me for stating the obvious. So I didn't know what to expect with my planned carnival. I've ended up with a dozen or so entries and so I'm delighted.

In all honesty this was very short notice so if anyone wants to make this a more regular feature, with us taking turns to host a monthly carnival, then please shout up and we can kick off an on-going Multiples Mayhem carnival?

The guest posts this week and the carnival entries have made me laugh and made me cry. I hope our small but perfectly formed carnival informs and entertains. 

Having twins? Relax and enjoy it by Young Mummy

Photo by Pat Austin on Flickr.

THANKS to the awesome Young Mummy for our latest guest post all about the trials and tribulations of having twins. Her post has made me smile -- I' definitely became a chilled out mum as soon as was humanly possible after having my girls. There just weren't enough hours in the day to be anything else!

MY mum commented the other day that I’m more like a second-time mum, rather than the first-time mum I really am, writes Young Mummy.

She doesn’t mean I’m some kind of parenting genius, just that I’m quite laid-back as a mother. And she puts this down to having twins.

So you think you know about twins?

 

THIS is the first guest post in a special week of multiple birth inspired topics. So it's a big welcome to Harriet from the much admired Is there a Plan B? blog which charts the trials and tribulations of shifting from being a London lawyer to a stay at home mum of three in Scotland.  

Her post made me laugh out loud. When I read about some of the questions she has been asked, it takes me back a bit. So, thank you very much Harriet and now it's over to her...

“Goodness, you’ve got your hands full!”
Thank you to Linda for hosting this week of multiple birth inspired posts and for her support of Tamba,

This is a post about about twins. And more precisely about the stuff everyone thinks they know about twins. 

And the stuff everyone says to mothers of twins (I’ve got A and S, who are eighteen months old and identical as well as 3-year-old L). 

And  about the stuff, that sometimes we wish they wouldn’t.

Healthy eating advice from Liz Hurley? No thanks

LIZ Hurley is a beautiful and successful actress-cum-model-cum-producer-cum-organic farmer. Her face adorns advertising hoardings, glossy magazine pages and carrier bags. I'm a fat mum of two who longs to be five stone lighter. My face adorns scary rollercoaster pictures.

But I won't be buying her "guilt free" bars thanks.

Here's why. Two years ago, I jotted down the following points after a life-changing appointment with the nutritionist Lyndel Costain.

How have you got on with SATs?

THIS week, my daughters, who are in Year six, took their SATs.

 

Despite all the discussion about how stressful a time this can be, I somehow thought my girls -- who are laid back, hardy little souls -- would sail through. I don't mean in terms of their academic ability (which I won't discuss thank you very much) but how tough they would find it to actually get on and do. I naively thought it would be a breeze.

 

Off they went to school on Monday, as relaxed as they could be, with my words to "just do your best, you know we love you," ringing in their ears. They had the best packed lunch ever and were mildly excited by the prospect of a free bacon sandwich on offer when they arrived.